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| Your role model vs. Your Reality |
When my husband and I found out I was pregnant we were 21, and in South Africa over the Christmas Holidays. I was there to meet his family (!!), and spend time getting to know the exciting and foreign place the man I loved grew up. There were many adventures had on our visit, a safari, a trip to the stunning Cape Town, days spent in the vineyards of Stellenbosch, and even a mini-retreat to the Draakensburg Mountains, where we stayed at a family friends resort, in the lap of luxury.
There adventure I didn't sign up for- the trip to the local pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test, because nothing says "Nice to meet you" like, "hey and I am pregnant too!"... I was taking birth control at the time- and who honestly gets pregnant on the pill?! (Well... apparently ME, and a lot of other women). If you've ever been curious to find out how to throw a wet blanket on the remainder of a month long trip to an exotic location most people never visit in their lifetimes, look no further! When the initial shock and disbelief wore off after reading the positive results of about 5 separate sticks we started to really panic. Although it may seem that up until this point that we should have had no problem adjusting to the addition of another person, especially because of our fancy trip and seeming excess of cash, in fact we were flying home to no place to live and a full remaining year of college! The week before we left on our trip the people we had been living with decided to drop a bomb on us and move out, and we were still undecided on where to go. I guess you can say we dodged that bullet, because there was no way in hell we would be able to bring a baby home into the situation we had been happy to live in; all night parties, beer cans on the floor and a bathroom with more living bacteria than a free clinic in Mexico. To my parents house we went! Believe me when I tell you, no one and nothing can prepare you or your boyfriend for the shock waves that will rock you after moving back home- head hung low, NOT finished with School, pregnant, and without a clue as to where you are going to go from there.. But we did it, and it builds character, but more importantly- it builds Humility (something I also have a lot to say about..another time).
Nine months, 65lbs (of Oreo's) and a Beautiful baby Boy later Wayne and I had a Brand new Beginning to begin. Throughout my pregnancy Wayne and I would joke about all of the things our Son to be, Chase/Hudson (Waynes/My name choice) would do or become; A tennis player like Dad, a free spirit like Mom, a genius that gets a totally free ride to college (don't deny it, you want that too for your kids/future kids), or maybe even his Grandpa Chris's choice- go into the military. At the end of the day when we were done dreaming up all of the possible things he could be or do, I always said a silent prayer (I do this all the time) that I didn't care if he did any of those things, i just wanted a healthy child. Hudson (I won!) Turner Tentler came into the world and we couldn't have been happier.
Hudson was so sweet and well behaved as a baby. He was the bright spot in an otherwise stressful and scary point in our lives at that time. I began to notice as Hudson got older that he was beginning to place his hands over his ears when there were loud noises, this started around 4 months, he was always attracted to the television, constantly stretching his neck out to see it even when he wasn't facing it, and by the time he reached 11 months he hadn't even begun to properly crawl. Despite these unusual characteristics we still thought we had a very typical child. Hudsons first word was "dance", and "flower" followed soon after. I wondered why he hadn't by a year old, it may have been even later, called me mom, or mama, or Wayne dad or dada. Something was strange. At 13 months it was like we hit the first of many walls, Hudson stopped accepting most foods. Up until that point he was a veracious eater, trying and enjoying almost everything I offered him. Overnight it was like a switch was flipped and he began to only seek crunchy foods; cereal, toast, pretzels, chicken nuggets, and cookies. Initially I was jut giving him what he wanted in an effort to just see him put something in his mouth and stop him from being upset, but before I realized it or could stop it, his entire diet became "beige". Hudson went for his 15 month well visit, and like the times before that one, received at least 4 shots. He ran a very high fever, which scared the hell out of me, and he woke up in the middle of the night babbling and disoriented. But I was told and reassured that fevers were normal after vaccines. Hudson really didn't progress much between his first birthday and his second birthday, he began walking but his communication was at an absolute minimum. He didn't even point to what he wanted express himself, instead he would stand in front of either the cabinet or the fridge, or wherever else and just cry until i pulled out whatever he wanted (after guessing).
His second Birthday came and went, and at our 2 year check up it was recommended that we seek out an evaluation from Birth23. His fevers, ear covering, late walking, non-responsiveness, and loss of language were enough red-flags to his pediatrician to push us to hear the news, that he probably already knew, from a qualified agency that could begin to intervene.
Knowing your child isnt progressing and suspecting there is something seriously wrong, and even whispering the "A" word in your own mind, are nothing compared to the slap in the face you feel from a complete stranger when they say it out loud after only spending an hour with you and your kid. We took our diagnosis, shook the therapists hand, and began our slow descent into space..
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| Hudson's First Picture |
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| 2 Months Nov. 2008 |
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| December 2008 |
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| February 2009 |
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| April 2009 |
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| July 2009 |
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| June 2010 |
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| October 2010 |
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| June 2011 |
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| Our family Summer 2011 |
